POUNAMU PIRACY!

Convictions for cultural crimes

On 5 June 2026, Xin Li and her son Boyuan Zhang were sentenced following their earlier convictions for trying to take expensively-purchased greenstone (pounamu) out of New Zealand. The pounamu they were trying to spirit off to China exceeded the legal export weight limit of 5 kilograms. The oriental offenders were fined $5,000 (a dollar for each gram of that weight limit).

This piece is not a defence of the discombobulated and dispirited duo. They broke a ludicrous law and, even if they weren’t aware they were committing a crime, ignorance of the law is no excuse. I’m simply reveling in the absurd over-reactions to their minor misdemeanor.

For those uninitiated in the monetized monopolization of New Zealand jade, non-tribe Ngāi Tahu’s “tribal” authority, Te Rūnanga o Ngāi Tahu (TNT), literally owns all greenstone. Parliament, on behalf of all New Zealanders, gifted TNT the entirety of New Zealand’s greenstone under the Ngāi Tahu (Pounamu Vesting) Act 1997. I’ve covered Ngāi Tahu previously:

Immediately following the convictions back in April 2026, Ngāi Tahu “representative” Susan Wallace (Ngāi Tahu struggles to find recruits with Māori names) claimed that the verdict was an emotional moment for ALL Ngāi Tahites - “it’s a huge outcome for us”. Susan advocated for all removals of legally-acquired pounamu from New Zealand to nevertheless be illegal without a special paid-for permit from Ngāi Tahu:

“We’d love to see it reduced down completely and that there is a special permit that might be given that would enable it to be taken out legally, but actually with the support of Ngāi Tahu rather than it being something that is, I guess, managed through the government.”

Green Rock Racketeering Rising!

Ngāi Tahu’s current “management plan” for pounamu apparently allows anyone, including tourists, to gather for themselves pounamu from designated West Coast beaches. Allowable pounamu is limited to what fossickers can carry on their person or in a backpack. But even where gathered in this way, tourists – if Ngāi Tahu has its way – will have to pay TNT explosive amounts to repatriate their pounamu.

And with sentencing, things got even funnier and more absurd. Ngāi Tahu ex-chair - and current deputy chair of the Climate Change Commission - Lisa Tumahai gave a “victim impact statement” on behalf of Ngāi Tahu:

“The illegal export of pounamu is not a victimless act. It is not only a breach of law, but a violation of our whakapapa and cultural responsibility. We ask the Court to send a clear message that our culture is not for sale.”

Not-much-Māori Ngāi Tahite Francois Tumahai is Lisa Tumahai’s hubby. Mafias like Ngāi Tahu are family affairs. Francois mounted his high horse and went on the charge, spouting:

“This is a signal to them that this is just the beginning, we aren’t going to stop, and if you think you’re going to not get caught, well you better think again…so good luck, have a crack and see what happens. Bring it on.”

Customs prosecutor Anna Devanthasan fervently rejected any notion that the culprits were unwitting dupes or victims of circumstance.

Speaking after the sentencing, insipid Customs investigations manager Dominic Adams, brimming with righteous triumph, said the officers who discovered the pounamu would be celebrating the result:

“They really feel a sense of accomplishment, and once I’m able to tell them they’ll be even more pleased to know that there’s a conviction that’s been laid down. Yeah, there will be a cake.”

Wouldn’t it be nice if cringe worthy Dominic and his minions had more success intercepting the cakes of methamphetamine entering New Zealand.

Pounamu is not a gem. It’s rock. But the Stuff(ed)/Three News coverage of sentencing is a metaphorical gem, a treasure trove of twaddle. Here’s the URL:

https://www.stuff.co.nznews/3608857/pounamu-smugglers-sentenced-unprecedented-case

Judge Richard McIlraith was clearly not to be outdone on all the virtue projection and claimed victimhood, parroting from his pulpit, “Customs are correct to point to the harm caused by your offending. I accept that this is not a victimless crime.”

Particularly Pakeha-ish Paul Madgwick joined the Pounamu Pile-On, pontificating:

“It’s a finite resource. God’s not making any more…It’s more than just a stone pulled out of the river. It has whakapapa”.

Madgwick’s madness reminds me of the late Sir Bob Jones’ comment about Ngāi Tahu Elder Statesman, Stephen (now “Tipene”) O’Regan… “I knew Stephen before he was even Māori”.

Francois Tumahai then chimes in with:

“For them [Customs] it’s about money. For us it’s not. This is our taonga. This is who we are.… We don’t want to stop it. We just want to get control and make sure that what people are buying is authentic.”

Francois’ utterances meld nicely with Ngāi Tahu’s constant claim that everyone with Ngāi Tahu ancestry is quite literally descended from New Zealand’s tallest mountain, Mt Cook/Aoraki.

My favourite is possibly the breathless Three News reporter, who’s apparently got himself his very own pounamu pendant (lawfully acquired, one would hope).

All these claims of victimhood and the ritual humiliation of the Pounamu Pilferers from Peking beg the question of who the real victims are.

According to Paul Madgwick, the green rocks themselves are the victims, “It’s more than just a stone pulled out of the river. It has whakapapa”. Alternatively, according to Francois Tumahai, humans with Ngāi Tahu ancestry and pounamu are one and the same, and this strange amalgam of flesh and stone is verily the true victim - “This is who we are”. Francois may have rocks in his head, but he’s not greenstone.

Others suggest that every single human with Ngāi Tahu ancestry is the pitiable victim of Xin Li and Boyuan Zhang’s pounamu perfidy.

But assuming victimhood can be a real “thing” outside of those who fall victim to actual criminal violence or property crime, perhaps the real victims here are those who, by accident of birth, are bereft of Ngāi Tahu ancestry. Those unfortunate individuals can’t reap the rewards of Ngāi Tahu’s cunning monetization of a plentiful, naturally occurring type of rock.

Many New Zealanders missing mythical Ngāi Tahu ancestry still possess pounamu artefacts. When under attack from other Māori, Māori often cached (hid) valued items in the hope of recovering them later, only to be slaughtered. Centuries later, such caches are sometimes discovered. Other non-Ngāi Tahites have been gifted pounamu and weapons and other bits and pieces comprising pounamu.

Many New Zealanders therefore possess legitimate private collections that include pounamu. But be very careful loaning any such collection to a museum. With the best of legal efforts to retain ownership and control, museums and particularly New Zealand’s national Te Papa museum will deem your artefacts to be “taonga tūturu” and “consult” with Māori - and neither you nor your descendants will ever get your precious pounamu property back.

So, what cultural transformations are motivating all this monetized mumbo jumbo? Here are my pounamu stabs in the dark…

The Abrahamic religions, including Christianity, replaced animism in the regions where those religions came to dominate. Animism is any belief system holding that places, objects and creatures all possess a distinct spiritual essence. Animism perceives all things – animals, plants, rocks, rivers, weather, human handiworks and even words - as being animated by own agency and free will.

Christianity has its holy relics - finger bones allegedly from Jesus of Nazareth, Shrouds of Turin etc. With Christianity fading from New Zealand, I contend that Māori animism is NZ’s rising New Religion, complete with spiritually animated pounamu and holy pounamu relics.

To keep New Zealand’s unenlightened humans on the hop, Ngāi Tahu sometimes refers to itself as Kāi Tahu, on the pretext that South Island Māori tended to pronounce their “Ng”s as “K”s. Whether or not that’s true, it fits nicely with the burgeoning numbers of tribal Karens joining “Kāi” Tahu (a few of whom I’ve covered above).

Ngāi Tahu’s population was way less than 500 when the “tribe” signed the Treaty of Waitangi. Nowadays, the official number is 90,000. Ngāi Tahite Karens have clearly been breeding like South Island rabbits over the last almost-200 years.